Well, we checked into the hospital yesterday (Wed) at 4:00. On the drive, we took a few phone calls about the rental property. That tells you something about the type of woman Wendy is…On her way to the hospital, and still thinking about our lives. She’s great, and I think my respect for her will grow exponentially over the next few hours.

Anyway, we got all checked in over at the prenatal unit about 4:30 or so. We watched a little TV and my parents showed up around 7:00. They brought us chocolate covered pretzels, and my Mom also brought with her a couple of stuffed animals and a plaque that hung in my room when I was a kid. That will be neat to have that in Cooper’s room.
Kristen showed up after Ky and Kade’s (Cotton Candy’s j/k) baseball game, around 9:00. She brought me a Swenson’s cheeseburger and an onion ring. Not just one, but a whole order. (That was a joke).
At about 12:00 we turned the light off and tried to get some sleep. I did fall asleep in a recliner, and Kristen pushed three chairs together to form her bed. I think I finally fell asleep about 1:30 or so, and by the time I woke up my neck and back and legs were killing me. I was hurting. I gathered a sheet and made a little bed on the floor. Wasn’t comfortable at all, but it certainly was better than that crappy plastic recliner. I think somehow between Wendy, Kristen, and I we managed to get a full night’s sleep.
On to today…
This morning, they woke us up about 6:30. Wendy got right in the shower, and soon after they moved us to the delivery unit. We have been hanging out all day (it’s now 3:15 PM) waiting for Wendy’s cervix to dilate. I got to do a little dance in the shower, and when I got out, they wanted to get the epidural put in. Sandy and I went down to the cafeteria, where I got some chicken tenders. When we came back, Wendy was sleeping and Kristen had straightened up the room. Not too long after (about ½ hour or so) the team came in and broke Wendy’s water. The doctor said that she is now about 2 cm dilated. That is good news.
And so, that is where we stand. We are all nervous, anxious, and excited. Above all, we are excited. Well, I guess I shouldn’t speak for everyone, but I sure am excited.

What a crazy world. Gas prices are out of control ($3.59 a gallon or more), rice and food costs are up (scary buying a restaurant right now), everything is out of control. Basically, it’s too expensive to be alive! Even when you are dead, someone is paying for you to have a funeral and commit you to the Earth. Amazing! They have already figured out how to get rich by selling bottled water, I am predicting that oxygen bars are the next big thing to explode. I hear they are already huge out west…they are heading this way. We will be paying to drink clean water, and breathe clean air. Sad.

Anyway, I have set my goal of retirement to be at 45 years old. That gives me 15 years to earn a massive amount of money. I can do it, I know I can. Everyone keeps laughing at me when I tell them this. They say, “That’s what we thought too!” Well that’s fine, but mark me down as saying that I am going to do it. It has now been documented.

Wendy and I have been very busy with charity type events lately. We both made it up to the Blues Brother’s Brigade spaghetti dinner last week (April 24th) at ST. John’s social hall. It was a fun night, although we were a little disappointed with the amount of money we raised (about $5,000). I know, I know, you’re thinking that’s good! And it is, just compared to the $11,000 we raised last year, it was a bit disappointing. Still, it is something to be proud of.

We also held our 2nd Annual poker tournament on the 26th of April. Only had about 38 players compared to the 60+ the first couple of years. (This is the 2nd Annual, but the 3rd overall-if that makes any sense?) Wendy finished 4th and I was very proud of her.

Anyway, I think the bottom line is that people are struggling right now. Prices of just about everything are inflated, and people are living frugally. That’s ok, and smart, but it doesn’t help when you are trying to raise money for charity.

Finally, we are so super excited to be having our baby within the next 3 weeks. I have not written much about him (yet). I say that because I'm sure that I will want to write about the "Coop" everyday. I can't wait to hold you.

...By the way, you will be a Brown's fan.

...Smile, today could be your last.

Wendy had her third and final baby shower this past Sunday April 20th. It also happened to be my birthday. The boys hung out in the basement, while the women all ooohed and awwwed over the little socks, and tiny blankets. I had to go up and take some abuse for a while, but really Wendy (and I) have great friends and a great support system. We are truly lucky and blessed. We got lots of good stuff that the baby can use for a long time to come. Sandy bought me a neon guitar for the baby’s room. I thought it was neat.

So, I decided on Sunday that I am going to try to grow out my goat-tee. My friend Joe G. competed in 2007 at the beard and moustache championships.

Here is a little about them…

Beard Team USA competes for the United States at the biennial World Beard and Moustache Championships. In doing so, our primary goal is to promote the worldwide appreciation of beards and moustaches. Other goals include making the United States competitive in the WBMC, promoting and publicizing the WBMC, facilitating the attendance of members and others at the championships, having fun, and making new friends from our own and other countries.

Joe competed at the world championships held in Brighton, England in 2007. He took 4th place in his category. If you are interested you can visit their website:

http://beardteamusa.org/index.html

Here is a picture of Joe:

So over the next several months I will attempt to document the growth of my goat-tee (or partial beard as they refer to it). The next championships is May 23rd, 2009 in Anchorage, Alaska. What a great reason to get to see Alaska. I did notice that there is a Pennsylvania State beard and moustache championship in Oil City, PA. Perhaps I’ll try attending this one and see what happens. I’ll have to let Joe know about it.

…I’m interested to see how long it takes Wendy to get mad and tell me to shave. I hinted that I am in “training” but I don’t think she has taken me seriously yet.

I’ll keep you posted.

Smile…today could be your last.

I have a ton of work to do today, but I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to get these pictures posted. I took off this morning from work at around 11:00, and met Wendy at the hospital. Her appointment was at 11:20. We sat in the waiting room until about 11:40 (she peed twice).

I can’t believe the pictures that they can take these days. The 3-D image is simply amazing. Wendy and I were just speechless. Amazing.

As of Monday (4/14/08) Cooper weighs 5 lbs. 5ozs. The doctor says that he is right where he needs to be and that everything looks good. He is in the upper 58 percentile as far as his weight goes. The doctor expects him to be about 9 lbs. when he is born. He also expects him to stay in there for pretty much the entire term.

Cooper’s arms are behind his head and his feet were up by his mouth.

I think you will come about a week early. My prediction is that your birthday will be on May 18th. Ok, I guess that is not a full week early, but early nonetheless.

These are Built to Spill lyrics that remind me of being a baby…

”Living in the womb. Running out of room. Have to come out soon. Have to meet the sun and moon and…”

Here is Wendy and Dr. Stewart. (I think it's funny that his name is Jon Stewart.)

Smile...today could be your last.

I just got done watching a lecture by one of the most inspiring people I have ever seen. Randy Pausch, a professor at Carnegie Mellon has terminal cancer and has shared his story and inspired millions by his last lecture. I will say nothing more than the fact that this is truly inspirational. I have never been moved like this by a lecture before after ten years of college. Check it out: http://youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo

Watching Professor Pausch’s lecture has inspired me to create a list of things that I want to do before I die. Having cancer myself, I realize that life is short and precious. So here goes...

1) Earn doctorate
2) Coach football
3) Teach PE in a gymnasium
4) Ride my scooter all day long with no agenda
5) Learn to play classical guitar
6) Learn to play the piano
7) Learn a foreign language
8) Meet Ben Stein
9) Own multiple businesses
10) Take my Dad fishing
11) Travel with my wife
12) Write and record music
13) Leave my family financially stable
14) Finally, and most importantly, I cannot wait to teach my son about life.

I’m sure that I have others. And I’m sure that there are some things on this list that I will not accomplish. Some of the things on the list are very vague. For instance “travel” does not say much. I need to leave this country. I need to see first hand how others live, and try to become part of that culture for even a week or so. This one is important to me.

I also need to learn to play the guitar. My brother left me three beautiful guitars which I need to get into. I have been playing a little, but my skills still leave much to be desired. I can do better.

I cannot wait to become a Dad. I want to teach my son all about what is important in life. There is nothing more important. Enough said.

Every day is precious, and you have to have fun.

Smile…today could be your last.

At this point in my life, I don't think there are many "cancer remedies" that I haven't heard about. The real answer is nobody knows.

I would like to think that if we cut fast food out of our diets, and stopped putting our plastic bottles in the freezers that cancer would just go away. But I think we can say with some certainty that this is not the case.

When I was diagnosed with cancer I was 28, and I like to think I was in pretty good shape. I watched my diet (to some extent), lifted weights, rode my bike, ran, etc... I had an overweight, out of shape teacher growing up, and I always told myself that being a PE teacher that I had to practice what I preach. Nobody feels like exercising all the time, but I did it, and it's what drove me. Unfortunately for me, I still got cancer.

Now considering that I had just watched my brother die a year earlier of Leukemia, I was in amazement, shocked, and stunned. The doctor's told me that my cancer is in no way linked to that of my brother, but I to this day do not believe that. I am still waiting for a researcher to approach me about doing a study, because the chances of two brothers getting cancer before they turn 30 have to be astronomical.

In essence, I think that it does not matter what type of milk you drink, or how many milligrams of chocolate per day you consume. The key to everything in life seems to be moderation. And even then, people will still get cancer. However, there are always exceptions to the rule. Ever meet somebody that has been smoking 2 or 3 packs a day for 50 years? Or the person that drinks 8 diet cokes, or 24 beers, or eats 3 squares of burger king and is 300 lbs. overweight? None of these things are healthy. But to answer the question of why some of these people get cancer and others do not, is to this point uncomprehensible.

It has to all go back to genetics. Yes, it is true that we all have cancer causing agents in our bodies. And it is also true that we are all exposed to different things in the environment. So, then is it our environment that triggers these cancer genes to surface in the form of tumors? Not an easy question to answer.

It is my belief that the truth is that cancer is a combination of environment and genetics. Cancer cannot exist and flourish without both. Much like a mold growing on a sandwich, the conditions have to be just right.

In conclusion, I do not believe that we can change how cancer effects us in our lives...at least not right now. Our technology is not great enough. If you are unfortunate, as my family was, to have cancer in your life, it is just bad timing. Much like polio killed hundreds of thousands of people in the 30's, 40's, and 50's, we are just soldiers of bad luck. Stuck in a time that is fighting for a cure. We have made great strides in the last few decades with cancer treatments. While we are on the right track, but it could be a while.

Smile...today could be your last.

Man...I really need to post more. I mean, it's been almost 5 months. Where have I been, and what have I been doing?

Hard to say. It's been a long winter. After the Benny Cowgill raffle, time went fast and slow at the same time-if that makes any sense. Christmas was good. Relaxing.

New Year's eve at the Bistro with Paul and Liz.

Feburary was, well, February.

March went to Athens for OGT testing.

And here we are...it's almost April.

Now I don't claim that my life is boring. Nor do I claim that it is fun filled and action packed. But it certainly is busy.

So througout all of the last few months, we have been extremely busy. We are expecting our baby sometime in May (around the 22nd). We now know that it is a boy. Wendy and I are leaning toward the name Cooper Guild. She picked Cooper and I chose Guild.

Here's the story behind that:

One night I was playing my brother's guitar (which I suck at). It is a beautiful "Guild" guitar deep red in color and sound. If there was one object that personified Bubba's life, it would most certainly be this. So, I am home with the dogs one night, playing what I think sounds good to me, and I look down at the neck of his guitar and see the word "Guild". I thought what a perfect name, and way to remember my brother, without naming my son "Brian". Not that there is anything wrong with the name "Brian", but I think there is certainly more meaning, and symbolism behing the name "Guild". There is a story there. It shows passion about what my brother did with his life. His life was music, and his guitars were his life. There were few moments that I lived with Bubba where I came home, and he wasn't strumming a guitar. It's just what he did...and what he did well. I will forever be envious of his ability. Try as I might, I will never play as beautifully as he did.

So that's the story of my son's name.

Smile...today could be your last.

In a time where the world seems like a place full of let-downs, I was reminded last weekend that all is not bad. Wendy and I were invited to the Benny Cowgill benefit. They are a foundation that helps families in need during their fight with Cancer-especially with children. Ben's own son lost a battle with cancer while he was in high school. Tickets were $100 to the event, but Ben told us to "Just show up". When I got to the door, I told them who I was, and was invited inside at no cost. What a nice gesture. It gets better.

I had a few drinks and talked with some locals that I had not seen for some time. Kent is a strange town filled with strange people. We ate a fabulous dinner of tenderloin, chicken, and all sorts of sides. Then the raffle began. Wendy showed up just after dinner, but the servers fixed her a plate and she ate while they began to pull ping-pong balls out of the hopper. We were out fairly quickly, but Wendy bid on (and won) Browns tickets for Nov. 4th. I am excited for this game. It gets better.

After the raffle, Ben Cowgill made a short speech about the foundation (this is their 11th year). I thought he was finished...I mean everyone had already clapped and everything. Then he continued to mention that there was two special people in attendance that had been married for just over a year. He mentioned that one of them was fighting Cancer, and the struggles that they were going through. He then presented Wendy and I a check for $3,000. He wanted us to know that the check was from his son, Benny.

Wendy was in tears. She reached out from her seat and took my hand. The entire room stood and applauded. Ben came over and gave us both hugs. I was truly touched by the generosity that suddenly filled my heart. It was one of those few moments where you could feel the love of strangers. This was not about money. It was certainly a generous gift, and much appreciated, but was truly a gift of a kindness.

I will include a pic of the Kent rough rider, until I can get a picture of Benny.

Smile...today could be your last.

I took my buddy to court today. He got his second DUI. Man, you have got to be careful. Anyway-

I find myself really thinking about money these days. Found out (after trying for a while) that Wendy and I are going to have a kid(s). We go for an ultrasound Friday to find out if it's more than one. I have never been so excited about anything in my life. I am also very nervous, which is why I've been thinking about money so much. Wendy has been in school for so long, which has been a huge sacrifice for both of us. We have been living in her sister's basement for almost a year now, and still have saved very little money. As least we are finally getting some of our debt paid down.

It seems to me that so many people in the world fall into jobs that they are so unqualified for. I mean, I know way too many people my age that are making 5X what I am making. I guess that is partly my fault for becoming a teacher. It certainly has its days of making you "feel good", being rewarding work and all, but will never give you total financial security. I have been living paycheck to paycheck for 4 years now. Time for change.
...Smile, today could be your last.

Wow. I blinked and my life fast-forwarded for over a year. And what a year it has been. I'm not sure where to even start. In Feb. of 2005, my twin brother was diagnosed with Leukemia. He fought it relentlessly without many breaks for 8 months. In October of the same year he passed away. I'm sure I will come back to this from time to time, but wanted to tell why I haven't been around lately.

In Sept. of 2006, I was diagnosed with my own cancer. Did 6 weeks of continuous chemotherapy and radiation. That took me to about Thanksgiving. Then in Jan. 2007, I had surgery removing about 16 inches of my intestines. I spent 12 days in the hospital. I'll come back to this from time to time as well.

I was given about a month and a half to recover, and then they drilled me with more chemotherapy. This time 12 cycles. I did it every other week, for three days at a time. I finally, finished this up a few weeks ago, and go for more tests in 9 days, to see where we now stand.

Wow. Those three short paragraphs summarize my life over the last year. I can't put into words how not fun the last two years of my life have been. I experienced my brother's death, his girlfriend passing away, and my own cancer. I get tired of hearing everyone bitch and moan about how tough they have it. I am grateful for so much in my life. Did we as humans forget how great it is to take in a sunset, or walk barefoot in the grass. What happened to the simple moments in life that should make us smile? Get off your cell phone for a minute and breathe the air.

I will touch on all of these things in greater detail in the future, but for now...
Smile, today could be your last.

It's been quite a while since I've tickled the keyboard. Here goes some other ideas of wisdom, comedy, and tragedy...

Watched South Park's episode with Jennifer Lopez and rolled on the floor laughing. Can't stop saying, "Taco-flavored kisses in my best impression of Cartman. Damn it that's funny...

Other random thoughts...
How does the government or (most of) our employers expect us to make it in society today? I am pushing 30 years old and am drowning in more debt than ever. Big businesses keep driving prices of everything skyward so that the billionaire in the 2,500 sq. ft. office can get a new, well, whatever he wants. It just makes me sick to think about it. Carry on corruption.

How do you know when it is your time to make some major changes in your life? It's as if you know you are not happy, but remain where you are because it is comfortable, familiar. And I mean anything: relationships, employment, etc...

I think about the meaning of life (as has been done since the beginning of time) and come up with little. I drink a lot. That always helps with philosophy. Doesn't help that I am sober now though. I guess we all spend our lives working for nothing. There is so much more to life then sitting in a shitty cubicle. Think I just made my mind up...
Time to move on.

Glad that we had this little talk self. Now let's go out and paint the town red with liqour I shouldn't drink and can't afford. Think I have issues...you have no idea.
Keep on keepin' on.
Smile...today could be your last.

Another day...Another blog that says nothing.It's hard to remain optimistic in a world that is so damn negative. Everywhere you look, someone is trying to tear you down. The impatient lady behind you at an intersection, beeping her horn, waving a fist at you. Companies overcharging you for a product that you don't even really want. Even people you know...Co-workers, sneaking off to tell stories about you. Or, even worse, relatives feuding and not-speaking because your baby looks like an "alien". Think that's a stretch...it really happened. No one has learned their lesson yet. And, perhaps that is the moment of your death. That precise moment when you know more than you should. When you have reached a state of human exactness. When you are worth more to another world, then you are to ours.I often think of the little lads who have to grow up without a Mom or Dad. Is there anything sadder? Life has been forever changed in the blink of an eye. Unfair.
It's hard to remain optomistic in a world that is so damn negative.If you've taken the time to read this far, take a long look at the picture of the little blonde boy. He will not know his Mother or Father. Go about your day now. Make it a better world today.
Smile...today could be your last.

Woke up in a terrible mood this morning. I was full of anger and rage. Ready to snap. Then I thought of my new friend Sara. I get to swim with her today for the last time. It's been 5 weeks, and I think she is comfortable with me now. I tell her that she is an angel. She doesn't repond. Not because she doesn't want to, but because she can't. It's hard to know what she is thinking, if anything at all. I am supposedly "normal" but there are plenty of times I can clear my mind and think of nothing at all. What would it be like if this was your everyday, all the time? I wonder, but then again, I am blessed enough to be able to even have thoughts like these.

Well, with this being my first post, I thought I would keep it short and simple. I would like to look back on these thoughts and smile, cry, and cringe someday in the future. It is a strange thing to put your thoughts onto the web, hanging out there like clothes on a wire for all to see...
Frankly, I am surprised that so many do.
Smile...today could be your last.
Vince